What does six months after death mean? Days of special remembrance of the deceased

The most detailed description: prayer for six months for the deceased - for our readers and subscribers.

Prayer for the repose of the soul of the deceased on 9 days, 3, 40 and the anniversary - how and why to read it

Prayer for the repose of the soul of the deceased is the most important part of any funeral or memorial. As, in particular, in our Orthodox faith, and in Christian religion generally. Why is this part of the funeral ritual given so much attention?

Prayer for the repose of the soul of the deceased - where did this tradition come from and why is it needed

Prayer after the death of a person is a long-standing part of any tradition, no matter Christian or pagan. They are called differently and are absolutely accepted different shapes, but the fact remains a fact. After the death of a person, he is seen off on his journey to the other side with a certain, established chant, memorial service, or other form of religious ritual. Because in every tradition, regardless of religion, there is a practice of seeing off a person.

Prayers for the repose facilitate a person’s transition from one world to another.

Why? What is the reason? Humanity's beliefs differ in many ways. But they all agreed that the human soul, burdened with sins, will hardly be able to get into better world. But everyone has relatives and people who love him. And the desire to make such a journey easier for a loved one is quite natural.

This is why there are prayers for the repose of the soul. After all, they are pronounced with ardent compassion, trying to help the deceased. Higher powers, seeing such zeal on the part of relatives and friends, understand that if he is loved so much, then the extent of sins can be moderated. By bad person It is unlikely that anyone will suffer.

So the existence of such rituals is quite understandable, both logically and emotionally. Everyone wants to help their relatives, whether alive or dead. Moreover, according to by and large, the deceased himself no longer needs either a coffin or a monument. He's already dead, he doesn't care. This is if we talk about the body. But the soul is another matter. It is for her that mourners offer prayers. And it’s worth knowing that such prayer can help the living too. In such a way that it will help them tune in to a spiritual mood. To stand, so to speak, on the same line of communication with Heaven. Think about how many sins have accumulated in everyone’s soul. And think about this topic - how many people will mourn at your own funeral?

When to read a prayer for the repose of the soul

Prayer for the repose of the soul of the deceased is an important part of the memorial service, when the soul most needs support during its wanderings. You cannot treat your dead relative carelessly, because God will feel your carelessness and will no longer be so lenient.

The most strong help will happen if you read such a prayer in Church. Before offering prayer, a living relative needs to visit the temple. It is best to arrive at the very beginning of the service, or a few minutes before. Bring a church note with you as it will need to be presented at the altar. The best moment is on proskomedia. Then, in the name of the deceased, they will take part of the special prosphora. With its help, you can receive great cleansing from sins when part of such a prosphora is placed in the Thicket of the Sacred Gifts. When the liturgy is over, a memorial service will also need to be celebrated. If you want prayer to become much more effective, then the mourner should take communion himself.

Eat certain days years when everyone is honored in the Church. From brothers and sisters who died with all Christian prayers and funeral services, to those who suffered a cruel or sudden death. Without the religious, ritual part that is required at such a moment.

1. Saturday, which is called meat fasting. It is celebrated eight days before Lent.
2. Saturdays bearing the name parenting days. They stand in the second, third and fourth weeks of Great Lent.
3. Trinity Saturday. Celebrated before the day of the Holy Trinity.
4. Radonitsa. Second week after Easter, Tuesday.
5. Saturday, which is considered both parental and Dimitrievsky. It is celebrated on the eighth of November, which is the day of remembrance of the saint and martyr, Demetrius of Thessalonica. Initially, it took place on the eve of the Battle of Kulikovo and during it the names of Orthodox soldiers who died defending their native land were remembered.
6. Commemoration of the Orthodox, deceased soldiers, May 9 (April 26, old style).

On the remembrance of the dead: memorial service, memorial prayer, parents' Saturdays

What else do you need to remember for proper commemoration? Firstly, special dates. The deceased should be remembered on his birthday, day of death and name day. Also on these days, it is advised to generously make church donations, where his name will always be honored. And also - alms to the poor, with the expectation that they will remember the name of your relative when they pray.

Text of the prayer for the repose of the soul of the deceased:

Remember, O Lord our God, in the faith and hope of the life of Thy eternally departed servant (name), and as the Good One and the Lover of Mankind, forgiving sins and consuming untruths, weaken, forsake and forgive all his voluntary and involuntary sins; deliver him from eternal torment and the fire of Gehenna and grant him the communion and pleasure of Your eternal good things, prepared for those who love You, and rest with Your saints, as you are Generous; There is no man who will live and not sin. But You are the only one besides all sin, and Your righteousness is righteousness forever; and You are the only God of mercies and generosity, and love for mankind, and to You we send glory, to the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit, now and ever and unto ages of ages. Amen.

Prayer for 9 days after death, as well as for the 3rd day, 40 days and anniversary

Why is the prayer read? at 3 days, 9 and 40 days after death? It is believed that during the first 3 days the soul prepares to depart. She is still in the body, but holds on to it with literally a few threads. Then, when the body is buried on the 3rd day, the last connection is broken. And from the 3rd day to the 9th day, the newly departed soul is shown the tabernacles of paradise, so to speak. What Paradise looks like, what pleasures await the soul, how good and pleasant it is there.

But when the 10th day comes, a completely different picture unfolds before the soul. They begin to show her the torments of hell and what awaits her if she ends up here. All this time she does not know what exactly awaits her, Heaven or Hell. And the deceased finds out about this only on the 40th day. It is these days, when the fate of the human soul is being decided, that it most of all needs support from living relatives. Therefore, it is customary to read prayers and perform memorial services on these dates. So, as we ourselves see, prayer for 9 days after death, for 3 days and for 40 are very important. After all, it is on these days that the fate of man, or rather the fate of the immortal soul, is decided.

There are several basic rules that must be followed when holding a wake at such significant dates. The first is the right atmosphere, at home, or together, where the event will take place. Relatives should pour water into a glass, put a slice of bread on top and light a lamp.

The second is the number of those who remember. There shouldn't be many of them. These are close relatives and friends, as well as colleagues with whom he maintained the closest contact. Women must match their hair to their headscarf, without exception. And men should be without any hats.

The third is an invitation. It is not customary to invite people to a wake, because this is the only way to find out who really cares about the peace of mind of the deceased. They must come on their own. But sometimes it happens that a person, under the weight of grief, forgets what day it is. So you can casually remind him without inviting him directly.

Funeral Divine Liturgy and memorial service in the Church of St. Nicholas the Wonderworker - Patriarchal Compound of Sofia

Fourth - food. Everyone who is going to set the table on this day should remember that compote, kutya and porridge in general are an obligatory attribute of the funeral table. You can prepare the deceased’s favorite food and place it at the head of the table.

Fifth and most important rule- you didn’t gather to dine. You must remember the deceased. Remember the pleasant moments you shared together, some facts from his life. Let it emerge in your memory as if alive. Like the person who was next to you. Feel its warmth.

Prayer for 9 days after death:

God of spirits and all flesh, having trampled down death and abolished the devil, and given life to Thy world! O Lord, give rest to the souls of your departed servants: holy patriarchs, His Eminence Metropolitans, Archbishops and Bishops, who served You in the priestly, church and monastic ranks;

Every sin committed by them in word or deed or thought, as a good Lover of mankind, God forgives, as if there is no man who will live and not sin. For You are the only one besides sin, Your righteousness is righteousness forever, and Your word- true. For You are the Resurrection, and the Life and Repose of Your departed servants (the name of the rivers), Christ our God, and to You we send glory with Your beginningless Father, and Your Most Holy, and Good, and Life-giving Spirit, now and ever and unto the ages of ages. Amen.

Prayer for 3 days:

Rest, O Lord, to the soul of Thy departed servant (Thy departed servant, the soul of Thy departed servant) (name) (bow), and as much as man has sinned in this life (humans have sinned), Thou, as the Lover of Mankind, forgive him (u, them) and have mercy (bow), deliver eternal torment (bow), give to the heavenly Kingdom a partaker (participant, partakers) (bow), and do something useful to our souls (bow).

Prayer for 40 days:

Rest, O Lord, the souls of Your departed servants: my parents, relatives, benefactors (their names), and all Orthodox Christians, and forgive them all sins, voluntary and involuntary, and grant them the Kingdom of Heaven.

Prayer for an anniversary after death:

God, merciful Lord, remembering the anniversary of the death of Your servant (name), we ask You to honor him (her) with a place in Your Kingdom, grant blessed peace and bring him into the radiance of Your glory.

Lord, look mercifully on our prayers for the soul of Your servant (name), whose anniversary of death we remember; we ask You to number him (her) among the host of Your saints, grant forgiveness of sins and eternal rest. Through Christ, Our Lord. Amen.

Prayer for the repose of the soul of the deceased is an important part of any funeral and memorial ceremony. Because it helps the soul to cleanse itself, both for the soul of the deceased and for the souls of the living. Moreover, when reading such a prayer, the Lord God himself will evaluate the actions of the deceased with greater mercy.

Hello Olga.
It’s very good that you can pray for your father!
First of all, order the magpie “On the Repose” from the Church; you absolutely need to do this. Secondly, in the prayer book in “Morning Prayers” there is a prayer “For the Dead”, it is located at the very end of the morning prayers. There is also the following petition: “Remember, Lord, the souls of Your departed servants, my parents ( their names), and all relatives according to the flesh; and forgive them all their sins, voluntary and involuntary, grant them the Kingdom and the communion of Thy eternal good things and Thy endless pleasures of life...” Then you can pray, reading the Psalter. In the Church, when Panikhidas are celebrated, 17 Kathisma is always read, this Kathisma you can read at home as well. The order of reading the entire Psalter for the departed is as follows: each kathisma begins with the prayer “Come, let us worship...” (three times); for each “Glory” the prayer “Remember, O Lord our God...” is read at the end. Sequences after the departure of the soul," and on it the memory of the deceased is commemorated, and at the end of the kathisma, the Trisagion according to the Lord's Prayer is read, the troparia of the rest and the prayer prescribed after each kathisma. Every pious layman can read the Psalter for the departed. Some prayer books have such a prayer rule " Litia for the departed, performed by a layman," if you find it, read this rule too. You can always pray for the departed, except on the day of Holy Easter. On this bright day of the Great Holiday, even in the Church there is no funeral service for the departed.
You can give alms with anything except drugs and alcohol.
You can donate clothes, money, food. Who should I give it to?
To whomever you want, just when giving alms, say: “For Christ’s sake, for the repose of God’s servant (s) (name).” Such alms will be protected as a good deed that you do for the sake of the Lord Jesus Christ. You can also give alms to the Church, for example, you can bring something from food to the Church refectory. To those homeless people who sit at the Church doors, and they are usually always drinking, you can only serve food, because... They will most likely drink the money away. Although the opinions of priests differ on this matter, some say that everyone should give, regardless of the person’s appearance (drunk or not) according to the word of the Lord Jesus Christ: “Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you” (Matthew .5.42), others say that it is best to give them food or clothing. I agree more with the opinion of the second priests that it is better to serve with food or clothing. But the poor (not drunkards) can and should be given according to their needs, if you can - with money, if not - then with clothes or food.
God bless you!

Archpriest Alexey

On what days are the dead remembered? Is it possible to perform funeral services for suicides? How to pray for deceased parents? Archpriest Igor FOMIN answered the most common questions about how to properly remember the dead.

What prayer should we use to remember the dead? How often do we remember the dead?

Christians remember their dead every day. In every prayer book you can find a prayer for the departed; it is an integral part of the home prayer rule. You can also remember the departed by reading the Psalter. Every day Christians read one kathisma from the Psalter. And in one of the chapters we remember our relatives (relatives), friends who have gone to the Lord.

Why remember the dead?

The fact is that life continues after death. Moreover, the final fate of a person is decided not after death, but at the second coming of our Lord Jesus Christ, which we are all waiting for. Therefore, before the second coming we can still change this fate. When we are alive, we can do this ourselves by doing good deeds and believing in Christ. Having died, we can no longer influence our own afterlife, but this can be done by people who remember us and have heart problems. The best way to change the posthumous fate of the deceased is a prayer for him.

When are the dead remembered? On what days are the dead commemorated? At what time of day can you remember?

The time of day when one can remember the deceased is not regulated by the Church. Eat folk traditions, which go back to paganism and clearly prescribe how and at what hour to remember the dead - but they have nothing to do with Christian prayer. God lives in space without time, and we can reach heaven at any moment of the day or night.
The Church has established special days of remembrance of those who are dear to us and have passed on to another world - the so-called Parental Saturdays. There are several of them a year, and all but one (May 9 - Commemoration of Dead Soldiers) have a moving date:
Meat Saturday (Ecumenical Parental Saturday) March 5, 2016.
Saturday of the 2nd week of Lent, March 26, 2016.
Saturday of the 3rd week of Lent, April 2, 2016.
Saturday of the 4th week of Lent, April 9, 2016.
Radonitsa May 10, 2016
May 9 - Commemoration of deceased soldiers
Trinity Saturday (Saturday before the holiday of Trinity). June 18, 2016.
Saturday Dimitrievskaya (Saturday before the day of memory of Dmitry Solunsky, which is celebrated on November 8). November 5, 2016.
In addition to Parental Saturdays, the deceased are remembered in church at every service - at the proskomedia, part of the Divine Liturgy that precedes it. Before the Liturgy, you can submit notes “of remembrance.” The note contains the name with which the person was baptized, in the genitive case.

How do you remember for 9 days? How do you remember for 40 days? How to remember for six months? How to remember for a year?

The ninth and fortieth days from the day of death are special milestones on the path from earthly life to eternal life. This transition does not occur immediately, but gradually. During this period (until the fortieth day), the deceased person gives an answer to the Lord. This moment is extremely important for the deceased; it is akin to childbirth, the birth of a little person. Therefore, during this period the deceased needs our help. Through prayer, good deeds, changing oneself in better side in honor and memory of someone close to us.
For six months, such a church commemoration does not exist. But there will be nothing bad if you remember it for six months, for example, by coming to the temple to pray.
An anniversary is a day of remembrance when we, those who loved a person, come together. The Lord commanded us: Where two or three are gathered in My name, there I am in the midst of them (Matthew 18:20). And joint remembrance, when we read a prayer for relatives and friends who are no longer with us, is a bright, resounding testimony to the Lord that the dead are not forgotten, that they are loved.

Should I remember on my birthday?

Yes, I believe that a person should be remembered on his birthday. The moment of birth is one of the significant, great stages in everyone’s life, so it will be good if you go to church, pray at home, go to the cemetery to remember the person.

Is it possible to perform funeral services for suicides? How to remember suicides?

The question of funeral services and church commemoration of suicides is very controversial. The fact is that the sin of suicide is one of the gravest. This is a sign of a person's distrust of God.
Each such case must be considered separately, because there are different types of suicides - conscious or unconscious, that is, in a state of severe mental disorder. The question of whether it is possible to have a funeral service and commemorate a baptized person who committed suicide in a church rests entirely with the responsibility of the ruling bishop. If a tragedy happened to one of your loved ones, you need to come to the ruling bishop of the region where the deceased lived and ask permission for a funeral service. The bishop will consider this question and give you an answer.

As for home prayer, you can certainly remember a person who committed suicide. But the most important thing is to do good deeds in his honor and memory.

What can you remember? Can you remember it with vodka? Why are they remembered with pancakes?

Trizny, funeral meals, came to us from time immemorial. But in ancient times they looked different. This was a treat, a feast not for the relatives of the deceased, but for the poor, crippled, orphans, that is, those who need help and would never be able to arrange such a meal for themselves.
Unfortunately, over time, the funeral feast turned from a matter of mercy into an ordinary home feast, often with copious amounts of alcohol...
Of course, such libations have nothing to do with real Christian commemoration and cannot in any way influence the posthumous fate of the deceased.

How to remember an unbaptized person?

A person who did not want to unite himself with the Church of Christ, naturally, cannot be commemorated in church. His posthumous fate remains at the discretion of the Lord, and we cannot influence the situation here in any way.
Unbaptized relatives can be remembered by praying for them at home and doing good deeds in their honor and memory. Try to change your life for the better, be faithful to Christ, remembering all the good things that the one who died unbaptized did during his life.

How are Muslims remembered? How are Jews remembered? How are Catholics remembered?

In this matter it makes no difference whether the deceased was a Muslim, a Catholic or a Jew. They are not in the womb Orthodox Church, therefore they are remembered as unbaptized. Their names cannot be written in notes for the proskomedia (the proskomedia is part of the Divine Liturgy that precedes it), but in their memory you can do good deeds and pray at home.

How to remember the dead in church?

In the temple, all those dead who united themselves with the Church of Christ in the Sacrament of Baptism are remembered. Even if a person for some reason did not go to church during his life, but was baptized, he can and should be remembered. Before the Divine Liturgy, you can submit a note “for proskomedia.”
Proskomedia is the part of the Divine Liturgy that precedes it. At the proskomedia, bread and wine are prepared for the future Sacrament of Communion - the transfusion of bread and wine into the Body and Blood of Christ. On it, not only the future Body of Christ (the Lamb is a large prosphora) and the future Blood of Christ for the Sacrament (wine) are prepared, but also a prayer is read for Christians - living or dead. For the Mother of God, the saints and us, ordinary believers, particles are taken out from the prosphora. Pay attention when they give you a small prosphora after Communion - it’s as if “someone picked out a piece” from it. It is the priest who takes out particles from the prosphora for each name written in the note “for proskomedia.”
At the end of the Liturgy, pieces of bread, symbolizing the souls of living or dead Christians, are immersed in a chalice with the Blood of Christ. The priest at this moment reads the prayer “Wash, Lord, the sins of those who are remembered here by Thy Blood With honest prayers Thy saints."
Also in churches there are special memorial services - requiems.



You can submit a separate note for the memorial service. But it is important not only to submit a note, but also to try to be personally present at the service where it will be read. You can find out about the time of this service from the temple servants, to whom a note is given.

How to remember the dead at home?

In every prayer book you can find a prayer for the departed; it is an integral part of the home prayer rule. You can also remember the departed by reading the Psalter. Every day Christians read one kathisma from the Psalter. And in one of the chapters we remember our relatives (relatives), friends who have gone to the Lord.

How to commemorate during Lent?

During Lent, there are special days of remembrance of the dead - Parents' Saturdays and Sunday, when full (as opposed to shortened on other days of Lent) Divine Liturgies are served. During these services, a proskomedia commemoration of the dead is performed, when for each person a piece is taken out of a large prosphora, symbolizing his soul.

How to remember the newly deceased?
From the first day of a person’s repose, the Psalter is read over his body. If the deceased is a priest, then the Gospel is read. The Psalter must continue to be read even after the funeral - until the fortieth day.
You can also remember the newly deceased with a sacrifice. For example, distribute his good, high-quality things to those in need - clothes, household items. This can be done from the first day after a person’s death.

When should you remember your parents?

There are no special days in the Church when we need to remember our parents, those who gave us life. Parents can always be remembered. And on Parents’ Saturdays in church, and every day at home, and by submitting notes “for proskomedia.” You can turn to the Lord at any day and hour, He will definitely hear you.

How to remember animals?

It is not customary to remember animals in Christianity. The teaching of the Church says that eternal life is prepared only for man, since only man has the soul for which we pray.

The man didn't die - he just left...

The man didn't die, he just left...
He left everything in the house as it was...
He just doesn't see or hear,
He no longer eats the bread of the earth...

He just became different from people
He opened another... astral path...
Where is another life... another wisdom
Where is the other salt... the other essence...

There will be a bookmark in the book
On the page about his love...
There is a note on the table... very briefly:
“Remember, but just... don’t call...”

The man didn't die... he just left
And opened air bridges
Between the shores past life
And another invisible feature...
Elena Gromtseva.

A wake is a ritual performed to honor the memory of the deceased. The basis of a wake is a joint meal, arranged by loved ones in the house of the deceased person, or in the dining room.

Funeral services are carried out by:

• on the day of death;
• three days after death - the day of the funeral, when the soul goes to another world;
• on the ninth day;
• on the fortieth day;
• the memorial meal is held six months after the death, and then on all subsequent anniversaries.

As usual, relatives or close people of the deceased come to the wake. It is important to remember that you cannot drive away those who come to honor the memory of the deceased. As a rule, wakes are organized not for guests and not for the sake of a feast, but with the goal of remembering the deceased and praying for his repose. It is especially important to read a prayer for the deceased before the funeral meal. Priests advise reading the seventeenth Kathisma from the Psalter and the prayer “Our Father” before starting to eat.

Shifting the date of the funeral

It happens that the memorial day falls on religious holiday, or on weekdays, when it is not possible to leave work, in connection with the preparation of everything necessary for the funeral meal. As a result, the question arises: is it possible to postpone the date of commemoration?

The priests believe that the meal can be held earlier or later exact date death. If there are good reasons that prevent you from holding a memorial dinner, you should focus, first of all, on them. However, if not good reasons In order to postpone the funeral meal to another day, it is better not to do this, because the afterlife has its own rules. On this day it is better to focus on good deeds, for example, distributing funeral food to people in need.

Funerals should not be held during Easter and holy week Great Lent. These weeks everything is focused on the sacrifice of Jesus Christ, as well as the news of his return to life. Therefore, if the date set aside for the funeral dinner coincides with these periods, it is best to move the funeral meal to the day of Radonitsa - the day when the deceased are remembered.

If Memorial Day falls on the eve of the Christmas holidays, it would be more correct if the commemoration is moved to January 8th. Such an event is taken as good omen, because the wake is dedicated to the event of birth into an endless life in another world.

The priests also recommend remembering that, first of all, you should pray for the deceased. Therefore, the day before the memorial meal, it is recommended to order the Liturgy for the burial of the Soul of the deceased and the Panikhida for the memorial day. And the memorial meal can be postponed to one of the first days off of subsequent anniversaries of death. However, it is not advisable to postpone the wake, organized on the fortieth day after repose, to an early date.

Memorial Day

In every religion for memorial day a certain date is set aside when relatives or simply close people remember the deceased. If, due to urgent circumstances, it was not possible to honor the memory of loved ones who have died on the day of their death, this must be done on the memorial day.

• In the Orthodox faith, the Tuesday of the second week after Easter is set aside for the memorial day. However, this is not the only day when you can remember your loved ones. In addition to Radonitsa, there are five more days dedicated to the memory of the deceased;
• In the Catholic faith, the memorial day falls on November 2. Commemoration on the third, seventh and thirtieth days may not suit you;
• In the religion of Islam, the main task is to remember the deceased through prayer, to do good deeds on his behalf: to help orphans and poor people. In this religion, it does not matter at all on what day after the repose of the soul the memorial meal will be held. It is important that no one should know in whose name these acts are committed;
• In Buddhism, the day of obedience - the Ulambana holiday - falls on the first half of the seventh month according to the Lunar calendar.

Everyone knows that people who have passed on to another world should be remembered, but people do not often understand for what purpose this should be done. Do not forget that there is a connection between the living and the dead. Therefore, after the death of a person, his loved ones are restless, there is anxiety and sadness in their souls, they often dream of the dead who ask for food or to provide them with some kind of help.

It is generally accepted that after such dreams a person should pray, visit a temple, and do some good deed (help the poor, orphans). All this goodness has good influence on the souls of the dead. If it is not possible to arrange a memorial service on the appointed day, do not be upset. You can leave a note for the clergyman, and he will conduct it himself.

The spiritual state of a person also influences the state of the deceased in the afterlife, in another world in order to help them. To do this, you should begin to change, first of all, yourself and the society around you. To begin with, it would be nice to free yourself from bad habits, forgive all your offenders, not bear grudges against them, start praying, visiting churches, reading the Bible, helping others and orphans.

During the commemoration, one should remember the purpose of a kind of ritual. When saying a general prayer, it is better to ask the Lord God to endow the deceased with the Kingdom of Heaven and give rest to his Soul.

The hour comes when the remains of the deceased are buried in the earth, where they will rest until the end of time and the general resurrection. But the love of the Mother of the Church for her child who has departed from this life does not dry out. On certain days, she makes prayers for the deceased and makes a bloodless sacrifice for his repose. Special days of commemoration are the third, ninth and fortieth (in this case, the day of death is considered the first). Commemoration on these days is sanctified by ancient church custom. It is consistent with the teaching of the Church about the state of the soul beyond the grave.

For the first two days, the soul of the deceased is still on earth, passing along with the Angel accompanying it through those places that attract it with memories of earthly joys and sorrows, evil and good deeds. The soul that loves the body sometimes wanders around the house in which the body is placed, and thus spends two days like a bird looking for a nest. A virtuous soul walks through those places in which it used to do the truth. On the third day, the Lord commands the soul to ascend to heaven to worship Him - the God of all. Therefore, the church commemoration of the soul that appeared before the face of the Just One is very timely.

Ninth day. The commemoration of the deceased on this day is in honor of the nine ranks of angels, who, as servants of the King of Heaven and representatives to Him for us, petition for pardon for the deceased.

After the third day, the soul, accompanied by an Angel, enters the heavenly abodes and contemplates their indescribable beauty. She remains in this state for six days. During this time, the soul forgets the sorrow that it felt while in the body and after leaving it. But if she is guilty of sins, then at the sight of the pleasure of the saints she begins to grieve and reproach herself: “Woe is me! How much I have become fussy in this world! I spent most of my life in carelessness and did not serve God as I should, so that I too would be worthy of this grace and glory. Alas for me, poor one!” On the ninth day, the Lord commands the Angels to again present the soul to Him for worship. The soul stands before the throne of the Most High with fear and trembling. But even at this time, the Holy Church again prays for the deceased, asking the merciful Judge to place the soul of her child with the saints.

Fortieth day. The forty-day period is very significant in the history and tradition of the Church as the time necessary for preparation and acceptance of the special Divine gift of the gracious help of the Heavenly Father. The Prophet Moses was honored to talk with God on Mount Sinai and receive the tablets of the law from Him only after a forty-day fast. The Israelites reached the promised land after forty years of wandering. Our Lord Jesus Christ Himself ascended into heaven on the fortieth day after His resurrection. Taking all this as a basis, the Church established commemoration on the fortieth day after death, so that the soul of the deceased would ascend the holy mountain of Heavenly Sinai, be rewarded with the sight of God, achieve the bliss promised to it and settle in the heavenly villages with the righteous.

After the second worship of the Lord, the Angels take the soul to hell, and it contemplates the cruel torment of unrepentant sinners. On the fortieth day, the soul ascends for the third time to worship God, and then its fate is decided - according to earthly affairs, it is assigned a place to stay until the Last Judgment. That is why church prayers and commemorations on this day are so timely. They atone for the sins of the deceased and ask for his soul to be placed in paradise with the saints.

Anniversary. The Church commemorates the deceased on the anniversary of their death. The basis for this establishment is obvious. It is known that the largest liturgical cycle is the annual circle, after which all the fixed holidays are repeated again. The anniversary of the death of a loved one is always marked with at least a heartfelt remembrance by loving family and friends. For an Orthodox believer, this is a birthday for a new, eternal life.

UNIVERSAL MEMORIAL SERVICES (PARENTAL SATURDAYS)

In addition to these days, the Church has established special days for the solemn, general, ecumenical commemoration of all fathers and brothers in faith who have passed away from time to time, who have been worthy of Christian death, as well as those who, having been caught by sudden death, were not guided into the afterlife by the prayers of the Church. The memorial services performed at this time, specified by the statutes of the Ecumenical Church, are called ecumenical, and the days on which the commemoration is performed are called ecumenical parental Saturdays. In the circle of the liturgical year, such days of general remembrance are:

Meat Saturday. Dedicating the Meat Week to the remembrance of the Last Last Judgment of Christ, the Church, in view of this judgment, established to intercede not only for its living members, but also for all those who have died from time immemorial, who have lived in piety, of all generations, ranks and conditions, especially for those who died a sudden death , and prays to the Lord for mercy on them. The solemn all-church commemoration of the departed on this Saturday (as well as on Trinity Saturday) brings great benefit and help to our deceased fathers and brothers and at the same time serves as an expression of the fullness of the church life that we live. For salvation is possible only in the Church - the community of believers, the members of which are not only those living, but also all those who have died in the faith. And communication with them through prayer, their prayerful remembrance is an expression of our common unity in the Church of Christ.

Saturday Trinity. The commemoration of all dead pious Christians was established on the Saturday before Pentecost due to the fact that the event of the descent of the Holy Spirit completed the economy of human salvation, and the deceased also participate in this salvation. Therefore, the Church, sending up prayers on Pentecost for the revival of all living by the Holy Spirit, asks on the very day of the holiday that for the departed the grace of the all-holy and all-sanctifying Spirit of the Comforter, which they were granted during their lifetime, would be a source of bliss, since by the Holy Spirit “every soul is given life.” " Therefore, the Church devotes the eve of the holiday, Saturday, to the remembrance of the departed and prayer for them. Saint Basil the Great, who composed the touching prayers of Vespers of Pentecost, says in them that the Lord especially on this day deigns to accept prayers for the dead and even for “those kept in hell.”

Parental Saturdays of the 2nd, 3rd and 4th weeks of the Holy Pentecost. On Holy Pentecost - the days of Great Lent, the feat of spirituality, the feat of repentance and charity to others - the Church calls on believers to be in the closest union of Christian love and peace not only with the living, but also with the dead, to perform prayerful commemorations of those who have departed from this life on designated days. In addition, the Saturdays of these weeks are designated by the Church for the remembrance of the dead for another reason that on the weekdays of Great Lent no funeral commemorations are performed (this includes funeral litanies, litias, memorial services, commemorations of the 3rd, 9th and 40th days by death, sorokousty), since there is no full liturgy every day, the celebration of which is associated with the commemoration of the dead. In order not to deprive the dead of the saving intercession of the Church on the days of the Holy Pentecost, the indicated Saturdays are allocated.

Radonitsa. The basis for the general commemoration of the dead, which takes place on the Tuesday after St. Thomas Week (Sunday), is, on the one hand, the remembrance of the descent of Jesus Christ into hell and His victory over death, connected with St. Thomas Sunday, and, on the other hand, the permission of the church charter to perform the usual commemoration of the dead after Holy and Holy Weeks, starting with Fomin Monday. On this day, believers come to the graves of their relatives and friends with the joyful news of the Resurrection of Christ. Hence the day of remembrance itself is called Radonitsa (or Radunitsa).

Unfortunately, during Soviet times, the custom was established of visiting cemeteries not on Radonitsa, but on the first day of Easter. It is natural for a believer to visit the graves of his loved ones after fervent prayer for their repose in the church - after a memorial service has been served in the church. During Easter week there are no funeral services, for Easter is an all-encompassing joy for believers in the Resurrection of our Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore, during the entire Easter week, funeral litanies are not pronounced (although the usual commemoration is performed at the proskomedia), and memorial services are not served.

CHURCH FUNERAL SERVICES

The deceased must be commemorated in the Church as often as possible, not only on designated special days of remembrance, but also on any other day. The Church makes the main prayer for the repose of deceased Orthodox Christians at the Divine Liturgy, offering a bloodless sacrifice to God for them. To do this, you should submit notes with their names to the church before the start of the liturgy (or the night before) (only baptized Orthodox Christians can be entered). At the proskomedia, particles will be taken out of the prosphora for their repose, which at the end of the liturgy will be lowered into the holy chalice and washed with the Blood of the Son of God. Let us remember that this is the greatest benefit we can provide to those who are dear to us. This is how it is said about commemoration at the liturgy in the Message of the Eastern Patriarchs: “We believe that the souls of people who fell into mortal sins and did not despair at death, but repented even before separation from real life, only did not have time to bear any fruits of repentance (such fruits could be their prayers, tears, kneeling during prayer vigils, contrition, consolation of the poor and expression in actions of love for God and neighbors) - the souls of such people descend into hell and suffer punishment for the sins they have committed, without, however, losing hope for relief. They receive relief through the infinite goodness of God through the prayers of priests and charity done for the dead, and especially through the power of bloodless sacrifice, which, in particular, the priest makes for every Christian for his loved ones, and in general the Catholic and Apostolic Church makes for everyone every day.”

An eight-pointed Orthodox cross is usually placed at the top of the note. Then the type of commemoration is indicated - “On repose”, after which the names of those commemorated in the genitive case are written in large, legible handwriting (to answer the question “who?”), and the clergy and monastics are mentioned first, indicating the rank and degree of monasticism (for example, Metropolitan John, schema-abbot Savva, archpriest Alexander, nun Rachel, Andrey, Nina).

All names must be given in church spelling (for example, Tatiana, Alexy) and in full (Mikhail, Lyubov, and not Misha, Lyuba).

The number of names on the note does not matter; you just need to take into account that the priest has the opportunity to read not very long notes more carefully. Therefore, it is better to submit several notes if you want to remember many of your loved ones.

By submitting notes, the parishioner makes a donation for the needs of the monastery or temple. To avoid embarrassment, please remember that the difference in prices (registered or plain notes) only reflects the difference in the amount of the donation. Also, do not be embarrassed if you did not hear the names of your relatives mentioned in the litany. As mentioned above, the main commemoration takes place at the proskomedia when removing particles from the prosphora. During the funeral litany, you can take out your memorial and pray for your loved ones. The prayer will be more effective if the one commemorating himself on that day partakes of the Body and Blood of Christ.

After the liturgy, a memorial service can be celebrated. The memorial service is served before the eve - a special table with an image of the crucifixion and rows of candlesticks. Here you can leave an offering for the needs of the temple in memory of deceased loved ones.

It is very important after death to order the sorokoust in the church - continuous commemoration during the liturgy for forty days. After its completion, the sorokoust can be ordered again. There are also long periods of commemoration - six months, a year. Some monasteries accept notes for eternal (as long as the monastery stands) commemoration or for commemoration during the reading of the Psalter (this is an ancient Orthodox custom). The more churches where prayer is offered, the better for our neighbor!

It is very useful on the memorable days of the deceased to donate to the church, give alms to the poor with a request to pray for him. On the eve you can bring sacrificial food. You cannot just bring meat food and alcohol (except for church wine) to the eve. The simplest type of sacrifice for the deceased is a candle that is lit for his repose.

Realizing that the most we can do for our deceased loved ones is to submit a note of remembrance at the liturgy, we should not forget to pray for them at home and perform acts of mercy.

MEMORY OF THE DECEASED AT HOME PRAYER

Prayer for the departed is our main and invaluable help to those who have passed into another world. The deceased, by and large, does not need a coffin, a grave monument, much less a memorial table - all this is just a tribute to traditions, albeit very pious ones. But the eternally living soul of the deceased experiences a great need for constant prayer, for it cannot itself do good deeds with which it would be able to appease the Lord. Home prayer for loved ones, including the dead, is the duty of every Orthodox Christian. St. Philaret, Metropolitan of Moscow, speaks about prayer for the dead: “If the all-discerning Wisdom of God does not forbid praying for the dead, does this not mean that it is still allowed to throw a rope, although not always reliable enough, but sometimes, and perhaps often, saving for souls who have fallen away from the shores of temporary life, but have not reached eternal refuge? Saving for those souls who waver over the abyss between bodily death and the final judgment of Christ, now rising by faith, now plunging into deeds unworthy of it, now elevated by grace, now brought down by the remains of a damaged nature, now ascended by Divine desire, now entangled in the rough, not yet completely stripped of the clothes of earthly thoughts..."

Home prayerful commemoration of a deceased Christian is very diverse. You should pray especially diligently for the deceased in the first forty days after his death. As already indicated in the section “Reading the Psalter for the Dead,” during this period it is very useful to read the Psalter about the deceased, at least one kathisma per day. You can also recommend reading an akathist about the repose of the departed. In general, the Church commands us to pray every day for deceased parents, relatives, known people and benefactors. For this purpose, the following short prayer is included in the daily morning prayers:

Prayer for the departed

Rest, O Lord, the souls of Your departed servants: my parents, relatives, benefactors (their names), and all Orthodox Christians, and forgive them all sins, voluntary and involuntary, and grant them the Kingdom of Heaven.

It is more convenient to read names from a commemoration book - a small book where the names of living and deceased relatives are written down. There is a pious custom of keeping family memorials, reading which Orthodox people remember by name many generations of their deceased ancestors.

FUNERAL MEAL

The pious custom of remembering the dead at meals has been known for a very long time. But, unfortunately, many funerals turn into an occasion for relatives to get together, discuss news, eat delicious food, while Orthodox Christians should pray for the deceased at the funeral table.

Before the meal, a litia should be performed - a short rite of requiem, which can be performed by a layman. As a last resort, you need to at least read Psalm 90 and the Lord’s Prayer. The first dish that is eaten at a wake is kutia (kolivo). These are boiled cereal grains (wheat or rice) with honey and raisins. Grains serve as a symbol of resurrection, and honey - the sweetness that the righteous enjoy in the Kingdom of God. According to the charter, kutia must be blessed with a special rite during a memorial service; if this is not possible, you need to sprinkle it with holy water.

Naturally, the owners want to provide a tasty treat for everyone who came to the funeral. But you must observe the fasts established by the Church and eat permitted foods: on Wednesdays, Fridays, and during long fasts, do not eat fasting foods. If the memory of the deceased occurs on a weekday during Lent, then the commemoration is moved to the Saturday or Sunday closest to it.

You must abstain from wine, especially vodka, at the funeral meal! The dead are not remembered with wine! Wine is a symbol of earthly joy, and a wake is an occasion for intense prayer for a person who may suffer greatly in the afterlife. You should not drink alcohol, even if the deceased himself liked to drink. It is known that “drunken” wakes often turn into an ugly gathering where the deceased is simply forgotten. At the table you need to remember the deceased, his good qualities and deeds (hence the name - wake). The custom of leaving a glass of vodka and a piece of bread at the table “for the deceased” is a relic of paganism and should not be observed in Orthodox families.

On the contrary, there are pious customs worthy of imitation. In many Orthodox families, the first to sit down at the funeral table are the poor and the poor, children and old women. They can also be given clothes and belongings of the deceased. Orthodox people can tell about numerous cases of confirmation from the afterlife of great help to the deceased as a result of the creation of alms by their relatives. Moreover, the loss of loved ones prompts many people to take the first step towards God, to begin living the life of an Orthodox Christian.

Thus, one living archimandrite tells the following incident from his pastoral practice.

“This happened in the difficult post-war years. A mother, tearful with grief, whose eight-year-old son Misha drowned, comes to me, the rector of the village church. And she says that she dreamed of Misha and complained about the cold - he was completely without clothes. I tell her: “Are any of his clothes left?” - "Yes, sure". - “Give it to your Mishin friends, they’ll probably find it useful.”

A few days later she tells me that she again saw Misha in a dream: he was dressed in exactly the clothes that were given to his friends. He thanked him, but now complained of hunger. I advised to organize a memorial meal for the village children - Misha's friends and acquaintances. No matter how difficult it is in difficult times, what can you do for your beloved son! And the woman treated the children as best she could.

She came for the third time. She thanked me very much: “Misha said in a dream that now he is warm and nourished, but my prayers are not enough.” I taught her prayers and advised her not to leave acts of mercy for the future. She became a zealous parishioner, always ready to respond to requests for help, and to the best of her ability she helped orphans, the poor and the poor.”